My Jalbab/Hijab Story By Barokat Abeebulah

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HMMM, HOW DOES IT REALLY STARTED?

Honestly, I must confess that it’s a great opportunity to be an hijabite and the transformation story goes like this.

I was actually born and brought up in Muslim background where we are just Muslims and not really a practical one. I am the first daughter of the family of four children which I found it luckily to have everything I demanded for. I am very young when this hijab of a thing started and am just in SSS1 going to SSS2.

I involved myself in a vocational training: that is hairstylist precisely and that was then in JSS3. I was the first apprentice and three junior apprentice came after me at Bowen University Complex.

Different people always patronized us and with that, I must say majority of our customers loved me because they knew I loved what I was doing even as a teenager. I always put on pretty dresses to look good and friendly. You know working in an institution made me love worldly things and having a great mum as a boss made it so lively and I loved the live I am living then.

There comes a day in my area where I saw a beautiful sister, so Charming that I couldn’t think straight than to approach herher.  She was putting on black Jalbab and she was kinda chubby like me . I approached with a smile and she even welcomed me more than my expectation. There and then, friendship started which I later realized she does pass through my area whenever she is going to Modrasah, she does pay me visit and gist a lot.

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Frankly, she doesn’t even think for once to tell me more about this Islam, probably the friendship aspect doesn’t allow her. Nevertheless, I just wanted to attend that modrasah too, it just came natural. I told mum about my instincts of going to Modrasah and she was flabbergasted. She advised me to talk about it with dad.

Unfortunately, dad opposed that Modrasah that I choose, he prefered me going elsewhere because he knows their uniforms (full Kimar, gloves and socks). He couldn’t imagine me wearing hijab, Ah! His beautiful daughter for that matter. I later convinced him since it’s just for school hours and luckily for me again, he accepted.

I started with the intent of knowing more about Islam. At first, I think I have these things in me, and whenever I see people praying. I just felt doing the same and anytime am being blessed to remember Allah. I would cry bitterly and pray… Oh! Allah, make me better, use me, make it a wonderful thing that will surprise everyone. Most importantly, am the type that believe in myself and knew I can do better.

Furthermore, with the support of my always supportive mum and big sis, also my amiable Ustadh Yaqub and many more, I embraced Islam totally. I quited my first love (hairstylist) because I was told that Allah does not want majority of what we do in it, I felt empty, no more music, no more dance and sobbing all days just to love Allah more.

I decided to wear small hijab to school and put on full kimar after school all just because it’s getting part of me. I must tell you, my senior secondary school was extremely bored and painful because I couldn’t do what makes its to be fun and lively anymore.

Unexpectedly, I was disappointed by someone my heart got attached to, it was so painful. The pain alters my personality that I was no longer the sweet girl I used to be, the girl that had so many goals to achieve.

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I used to expect more from life, the type that wanted attention all to herself, the young girl that focuses on Duniya and not Akhirah… With all all these challenges, I was able to get rid of it by not living my life to pleased anyone but Allah. I no longer care about what others think of Hijab.

I think more about Akhira and I don’t want to sacrifice it for anything, not a family, not friends,not job or man because they can replace me anytime or I myself might have gone anytime sooner or later.

Alhamdulilah for Islam; for making me to be more focus on hereafter and not Duniya and thanks to my mum, my dearest sisters/brothers and friends that are always there whenever I felt so weak, thanks to my ustaz that encourages with different words of Rosul SAW especially the one that says: “the world is like a prison for believers…” as at now, all I care about is pleasing Allah. Insha Allah I will not stop being a muslimah and will never and forever think of stopping wearing hijab.

Barokat Abeebullah

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