What Men Hate About Women (Strictly For Ladies Please) By Aderanti Adebukola Adesewa
I’ve been privileged by grace to speak with scores of men in a heart to heart discussions on marriage: some under strict condition of secrecy, others mild disclosure and a few openly. I’ve had to refrain a grandfather from crying over his wife’s attitude, I’ve met bitter young husbands whose greatest life regret is marriage.
It spreads across the board without regards to social, spiritual, scientific or substance status. I’m not sure which gender cries more in modern homes again, but I’m confident men are crying, drying and dying in silence. Unfortunately, most men on this slope of the globe are cultured not to give real expression to their emotion until the fuse blows off!
I found it common with almost all scores of cases I’m honoured to handle. “Better to live on the corner of a roof than to share a house with a nagging wife” Proverbs 21:9. Nothing pushes a man to a corner in the roof of secrecy than nagging. Do you nag at home? He will run into the corner of a business, ministry or career roof!
I get these lines of complaint a lot: “she doesn’t like to be pushed or challenged or corrected”. “She can watch movies from dawn till dusk or on chats or go shopping or fix hair forever leaving important things undone”. “She also doesn’t have boundaries with wrong friends”. Even as bad as “she doesn’t like intellectual discussions, she just nods like a lizard”! “She’s an ingrate, will never appreciate anything you do until you drop dead”!
Men hate to be compared with others unhealthily. Especially when you compare a strange packaged pastor who is an emotional brand manager in public profile with your weak but sincere husband! It’s an intellectual crime! Don’t compare your husband with your daddy; he could be worse; only that you’re used to your daddy’s abnormality over time. If he has issues, talk, watch and pray about it within the limits of love. Caveat: Don’t inflate your expectations, only a few people can change in a lifetime!
There are two extremes to this. Some men complain of excessive and worldly investment by their wives on their bodily container to the detriment of their intellectual and spiritual content. Others are frustrated by dirty, drossy, shabby, dangling dress sense. Both could be annoying. There’s a Christian culture of covering in dressing. You can’t be seductive and be spiritually productive. There’s no dignity in nudity. Know your body shape and structure before picking styles. Therefore, some shoes don’t fit you.
There are patterns fat people shouldn’t wear. If you’re slim with borehole on your neck and spiky collar bones struggling to burst out of your skin, why would you be on low neck dress? You have bulgy eyes you will still be fixing strained braids that pull back the skin on your skull and push out the bulbs. With all these scars and marks on your arms, you still wear sleeveless! How much are they selling sporty wears that you have to tie ten-yard wrappers around the house in your twenties and early thirties?
Try and reduce the thickness and trucks of powder invested like bricklayer to plaster your face. If you’re not proud of a natural look, you’re a suspect of ill will! If artists run out of drawing paper and canvas, must they substitute with your face? Moderation is relative, and excesses are subjective but always be on the side of caution!
I’ve launched a crusade towards all the wives and ladies in my spheres of influence. I will take you up on appearance henceforth. I will commend you for looking good than before with handsome rewards for an exceptional, cute, simple and godly impression. Also, I will not spare you if you refuse the interest-free loan of common sense. I will defend my brothers today!