Depression: Symptoms and Sure Recipe For Overcoming Depression | By Olumide A. Soremekun
Depression has been defined one way or the other (correctly) by those who attempted.
According to the Merriam Websters dictionary, depression is:
1) a state of feeling sad.
2) a serious medical condition in which a person feels very sad, hopeless, and unimportant and often is unable to live in a normal way
Symptoms of depression include:
1) General sadness.
2) Lack of appetite.
3) Too much laughing at unnecessary things (shallow, loud laughs).
4) Critical spirit (pent up frustration is let out in forms of lashing out and criticizing other people).
5) General ill health.
6) Withdrawal from social activities etc.
7) Trying to prove your worth by doing stupid and dangerous things.
To mention but a few.
General overview of the problem
Lack of openness about one’s struggles including defiantly ignoring loving gestures by people who really care are few of the causes of why depression lingers.
Those who commit suicide are non-participatory, nonchalant, non-revealing, non communicating, non-receptive to the care and attention of people.
If you want to be happy in this life, accept and appreciate love, care and attention from sincere people, irrespective of whether they were the ones you expected it from or not.
The thing is, you expected it, and it came. Simple.
People who suffer in silence rationalise and say, ‘ nobody understands’, ‘no one can understand’. How can they understand what you are not willing to talk about?
Many times some people come to ask for advice or therapy, and I ask them what exactly the issue is, but my capacity to help them, is based on their willingness to talk; I can’t solve their problem if they do not talk to me about the problem.
After my almost one year of the great depression in 2011-2012, and another terrible bout in 2017, I discovered that a sure recipe for overcoming depression includes:
1- Know your identity.
Once I know whom I am in God, I rest, assured that all is well. Most people with suicidal tendencies have an identity crisis.
When you don’t know whom you are, you suffer low self-esteem.
Also, don’t fall into the productivity trap-feeling good only on days when things work well and allowing feelings of worthlessness to grip you on days you don’t do so well.
Be conscious of your essence as a human being that what you are able to buy, wear or do. Many people cannot separate their person from the events that occur to them.
Failure is an event. My person is my essence. Failure is what may happen to me; failure is not whom I am.
When you understand this and find a company in, and with the people who see your essence other than your events, you can and will soar high and beat depression (overcoming depression with ease).
2- Show gratitude.
I am constantly on the look out for a person, a gesture, an event, a situation, to be grateful for. I verbalise my gratitude too, especially to people. That way, there is a cycle of positivity around me, as people feel appreciated and interested to come and seek me next time.
Those of you who are constantly looking for who to criticise and shout on are probably suffering from depression. The only things that excite you are gloominess, failure and wrong things. You have a problem, a big one.
Also, those who are excited about intentional disobedience of simple instructions to gain attention and prove a point are just laying a foundation for depression; because of one day, your tantrums and naughtiness will attract no attention. And believe me, being left alone is the last thing you want.
3- Initiate empathy.
Whenever I see someone in a bad situation, I find ways to ameliorate their situation. I don’t care if I know them from Adam or not. I just must do something to help. In helping them, I feel useful, and there is an increase in joy and peace in my own life too.
Understanding that love given is love enjoyed, will help you in this regard.
Share love with those who need it. Selfish people are usually constantly depressed. Stop asking what is in it for you; start looking beyond yourself and start doing something for others.
Start initiating meaningful conversations and keep stable friendships.
4- Relax and talk to friends.
Rest is an essential part of a healthy life. I might not take a physical rest (I hardly take afternoon naps), but talking with friends is my own way of releasing the tension that has built up over time.
These are a few of what has kept me in a more stabilized mental state.
Depression is a mental problem really.
Depression is not my portion if I know my onions well.
If you’re going through challenges, talk to your friends about it. Notice the word ‘friend’.
A friend is not necessarily someone who you talk to every day, a friend is someone who understands you, who can really read you and who will not leave you unattended to in times of problems.
A friend wants to listen to your issues and help you (if they can). Friends do not mock or make fun of your pain.
I am not saying I have not had tendencies to be depressed, I am saying I know my patterns and I use them ‘every time’ to break free from its grip.
Depression for me, is a choice, a place and an experience I can choose to make, have, stay or not.
I choose to have hope, to feel love, share love, keep the faith, and be patient while I work towards a better life.
There are so many things to worry about, but choosing to trust in the process of time and the providential power of the Almighty is a sure way to escaping the depression rut (overcoming depression).
I say no to depression.
What about you?
Olumide A. Soremekun.
To a better you.